Bitey Update: Sunday March 12th, 2006

Long time, no post.

Tuesday: The long run of not traveling for work came to an end Tuesday. I had to jump a plane to Phoenix, leaving Boyfriend to care for Bitey.

Unfortunately, the Boyfriend is in the thick of writing a new screenplay and time is of the essence. Also he is not a board-certified Bitey bladder expresser, so he has to leave his writing partner to take Bitey to the vet two times a day. Not good.

Wednesday: In an attempt to get any work done whatsoever, Boyfriend takes Bitey to the vet. In Phoenix, I feel like a Bad Mommy.
Thursday: Boyfriend wakes up super early (a real feat) and takes Bitey for his weekly radiation field trip. The kitty radiologist calls me after Bitey's treatment to say that he has seen some improvement in the cat, but says that if he doesn't see significant improvement this next week, he will stop radiation and chemo. In the middle of my job, it's hard to process this, but on the plane ride home that evening, I start thinking about the implications of that statement. I wonder what significant improvement means. Walking? Peeing on his own? What?

The vet also tells me that for the next two days, Bitey's pee is toxic. "Don't panic," he says. "Just wear gloves, and if he pees anywhere else, wipe it down with bleach." Great. Toxic kitty.

I come home late Thursday night. In front of my car at LAX I realize I have lost the car keys. So Best Boyfriend Ever has to drive all the way from Hollywood to LAX to give me the spare key. Then we both go to pick up Bitey at the kitty radiologists. It's 10:30pm by the time we all get home.

Friday: I bumble through work at the office, then take Bitey to the local vet for a professional expression. The local vet is very pleased with Bitey's progress. His front legs have become incredibly strong, like steel bars, and he uses them to full effect to try and resist being put on the scale. He also has increased "bum strength" which means he can make the necessary squeezing motion needed to evacuate his own bowels. He just has no back leg strength.

So we make it, barely, to another weekend. I have spent this weekend blissfully doing very little. Most time spent pulling stuff together for a Bitey fundraising yard sale, watching Red Sox spring training games, and smearing various creams on my cat's bum.

Bitey spends most of his time sleeping, which is not abnormal. Healthy cats can sleep 18-20 hours a day anyway. Our cat has developed a fondness for burrowing under the covers on the bed. He stays there for hours. He also stares out the window longingly.

I wish I could let him go outside, but you can't say to a cat, Bitey, you're sick. Why don't you just sun yourself on the porch, instead of trying to drag your paralyzed behind down the steps and onto the dirt. They lack the concept of restraint.

Right now, Bitey is hiding under the duvet, curled up against my leg as I type. He has developed a fondness for hiding under the covers, sometimes for hours. He has also developed a disdain for normal cat food, almost as if to say,

"You have put things up my butt, down my throat, and in my veins. You squeeze my bladder until toxic urine scalds my backside. Give me tuna."

So we do. Tuna straight from the can, milk in a bowl, and all the broccoli he wants. I mean, what's it going to do?